Wednesday, March 18, 2015

yours and mine








There is something pretty special happening each and everyday with this girl of mine.  I have had the privilege to watch her grow from a quiet and reserved toddler to a wonderfully brave child.  My heart skips a beat when she talks to the librarian or doesn't hesitate to jump on a tractor with a new friend.  It wasn't that long ago that we were seeking professional help for our preschooler who refused to talk in preschool (for a year).  Her hurdles have felt so personal or like I have failed at being a mom.  Now, in retrospect...I wish I could have had the ease to know everything was going to be ok (even though that was told to me over and over).  I have not always been so graceful and patient with Isabelle (and I can guarantee that isn't dramatically going to change in the near future...we will still butt heads) and can feel filled with disappointment and shame at times.   Ever so slowly I am acknowledging her journey is not my journey, I am only a willing participant.  It is HER journey.  And even more slowly - at a snails pace - I am forgiving myself, letting go of the shame, and enjoying my journey more and more. 

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