Coming home

We have been in Virginia for about 3 months now, this is a hard pill to swallow.  Part of my reasons for the blog break was because I couldn't quite put my feelings into words, nor did I want to.  This move and transition has been particularly hard.  I have been (and still am) gentle with myself and moving slowly.  Noticing my true feelings - both emotional and physical.  For the past 3 months I haven't felt particularly great about the move and I have tried to stay true to that.  I think I have received looks of concern and oddity.  When people ask me how things are going, I am honest....I will say..."it sucks" or "I'm pretty sad" or "I really miss home" etc. etc.  Most people, I believe, expect a sugar coated answer - but I have been relentless with honesty (such wisdom was received from some wonderful friends) and it is starting to ever so slowly pay off.    Over the holidays we headed "home" - first stop RI and then up to VT.  It was a bit of a whirl wind.  We spent time with friends and family, stayed up too late, laughed, cried (a lot), ate too much food, day dreamed, sat by a cozy fire, put out the flames that spat from my three year old, and romped in the snow at temperatures hovering 0.  It was beautiful, inspiring and chaotic - just what I needed to realize I needed to go home...to my new home....to Virginia.  It is terribly cliche, but oh so true, home is where the heart is - where my whole family is - where our things rest - where I can freely walk around in my undies and a cup of coffee.

Truth is, I'm not quite sure why we are here, aside from the obvious financial stability, I know deep down there must be other reasons life has called us here.  My eyes are now a little more open and I will be searching quietly and carefully.